i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
