whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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