I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
