She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Randomize
