i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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