Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
