I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
