Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
