How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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