i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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