and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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