Umm I'm too high to move.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
don't judge my taste in strippers
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
