On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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