Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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