Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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