Pregnant stripper...not hot.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
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