Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
