you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Randomize
