I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
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