Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize