She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
