Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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