he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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