It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
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