In the future we'll all be gay
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Randomize
