I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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