i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
