oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
