Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
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