I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
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