I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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