For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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