just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
