Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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