I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
This house was built for laser tag.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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