Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
