They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Vodka?
Forever.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
