I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
