I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
