remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
