Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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