Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
