Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
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