Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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