Don't you send me to vm
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
