Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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