but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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