Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
You pole danced in your parka.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
