is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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