My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
false alarm, still single
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